Strickland LIFE: The Summer Before Mary Part II

About a week after the kids got out of school I set out with a goal in mind for the summer. It was simple. No crazy bucket lists or lots of errands to run; I simply wanted to be present, loving, and not stressed. I wanted my kids to look back on the summer before Mary and remember laughter and special moments, not Mommy grumpy, fat, and yelling for everyone to clean all the time. Well here we are just a couple weeks away from Mary arriving and I'm not entirely sure if I met that goal. I suppose time will tell. Have I yelled and went on cleaning rants. Why yes. Yes I have. Have I played on my phone or locked myself in my room to watch an entire season of Mr. Selfridge? Yes. Did that too. Have I been flat out snotty to my darling little offspring. Guilty. Guilty. GUILTY. I mean- I'm super pregnant, exhausted, and irritable. I'm not sure my excuses give me a right. I was laying in bed just 2 nights ago thinking to myself what a failure I was. If only I could control my temper. If only I hadn't flipped out and burned those cupcakes. Twice. If only I had been cool, (literally- not sweating like a pig would be nice) calm, and collected, maybe then Martin wouldn't have made the statement "We should never make cupcakes again." Sad face. Maybe if I set a better example Lincoln wouldn't be running around at 2 years old yelling for everyone to "Shut Up!" This was not what I wanted our summer to be like. Luckily, every day is a new day and we keep trying. I continue to remind myself that they're just kids and I'm just me and we can all coexist as a family and love one another. We've had some pretty great moments along with the bad. I of course don't take a picture of myself flipping out while burning cupcakes. I also try to block out the image of pee on the toilet seat EVERY SINGLE TIME I go to use the facilities. LOVE YOU KIDS!! I did however snap some happy photos and I can only pray the kids remember these moments this summer.

Horse Back Riding